Why Relating is More Powerful than Transacting

Welcome back friends and a very wonderful Sunday to you all.  How was your week?  I had a particularly eventful and meaning-rich week (September 11th, published my first paper with my father, attended my first ‘Back to School’ night for our daughter’s preschool) and did not have to work hard at all to see a critical way that last week’s inquiry rang true for me.  I will take this as a rewarding sign that this newly established and evolving format, which I am letting my intuition and my heart guide me with, is exactly where I need to be and, I hope it is for you as well.

This week’s photo: Also in following with the theme of this blog, I am going to share pictures of my life, not random stock photos from the internet that highlight my theme.  This post’s picture is the last decent photo I can find of my family and I. This was a celebration night after my brother had successfully defended his dissertation from University of Washington (yup, I have a brother who is a PhD in genetics).  Sorry to my dear husband who is not included in the photo! I wanted to pay homage to my Dad this week in honor of our article.

Last Sunday, I left off asking you to reflect on two related questions for your week ahead:

How can you begin to share a deeper side of yourself at work and at home this week?

What gets in your way of doing this more frequently and honestly?

It was fantastic to hear from a variety of you through various channels that you were curious if it was appropriate or even relevant to share more about yourself or your opinions about the content of your work with your peers and customers. We talked about your concerns for the implication of doing so and what the costs could be for taking such a risk. You were boldest in voicing your curiosity of the benefits of sharing a deeper side of yourself as work.

My related AHA moment this week that re-enforced to me the lesson of why it is so powerful and critical to disclose personal meaning along with the content of your work:

I taught an all day seminar this week with my business partner.  I was the lead instructor this week and this is our second time to run this particular seminar series.  My partner is always helping me better streamline and blend my curriculum as I am a research nut and if left to my own devices I would do a data dump.  My partner, Cindy is fantastic at providing me with feedback but this week when we were debriefing she said to me, “Katie, it can feel transactional sometimes when you simply cite other people’s research.  You have so much personal and professional experience to draw from as it relates to the research you share.  You need to take a moment and reflect for your students on what each takeaway means for you.  This way, your students will be more comfortable sharing their own experience and less self-conscious of their own reactions, etc.”


There it is, there is the golden egg, that I wanted to provide to you with this last inquiry. And my universe, simply dropped it in my own lap for us all.  The key lesson here is that by being less transactional and more relational, you will connect and resonate with your peers on a level that aids in their particular adult learning process. As adults, we need to personalize our learnings in order to truly make a transition that is long-term and not merely cerebral.  Being able to do this for and with your clients and partners will stand you miles apart from your competition. I guarantee it.

Let me know if this resonates with you and if you have any other questions around how the entire group benefits when you take the time to offer your personal reaction and feelings about a matter at work.

My inquiry for this coming week is:

How do you elevate your game?

When tasked with an unprecedented (meaning bigger or higher profile than you have ever taken on before) role or project—how do you successfully prepare and execute?

Contacting Katie:

I am eager to hear your response to this inquiry as well as other questions you have.  Please email me at Katie@LegacyBuilderCoaching.com.

Have a fantastic week friends.  I can’t wait to hear about all your successes and breakthroughs.



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